"Well, perhaps the laws of physics cease to exist in your cups. Were these magic cups? I mean, did you buy them from the same guy who sold Jack his beanstalk beans?" - Vinny Gambini

Nothing new here really. I've spent enough time people watching on the Strip to say it is pretty common to see blackouts all over Las Vegas.

It's nice to see Fitzgerald staying true to the city and franchise that drafted him by embracing the longstanding Arizona tradition of being where old people go to play out their final years.

Anyone who actively seeks to fuck the NCAA is immediately one of my favourite individuals in college athletics.

Yes, yes I did. Fuck me.

Can we also get van Gaal's interpretation of Harry Kane's performance in the NLD? Just curious, because Deadspin didn't care to comment on the matter.

I actually agree. Dolan truly is a consummate New Yorker. He is a total fucking dickhead.

Finally, we can move on from deflate gate and start talking about things that are quintessentially football - injuries and player targeting.

Spartak fans taunting Zenit St Petersburg.

The fact I can't think of a joke for this is actually becoming quite jagravating.

Any list that has Las Vegas as one of the happiest places to work is invalid and completely full of shit to begin with as Vegas is pretty much a soulless hellhole.

Could be worse. I'm pretty sure when Patrick Henry said "Give me Liberty, or give me death", he was talking about the WNBA.

Wow, what a dedicated fan. I don't know if I'd have the gumption to pay such lip service to a QB with only a few years of good football left.

"Attacking Janay with Enthusiasm Unknown to Mankind"

If I were a Cavs fan, I'd literally be shitting myself right now. At this point, it's getting to be a total Blatter failure.

Seriously, just fuck Penn State and fuck the NCAA. That's all I've got. If the statue goes back up, there is no justice in this world.

Kinja does not allow me to give this the appropriate number of stars. + all the stars.

So let me get this straight - he left a team with a good defense and chronically poor play at the quarterback position for...a team with a good defense and chronically poor play at the quarterback position.

Wacky waving inflatable arm flailing tube man!

When asked about Gerrard leaving Liverpool to play in the MLS, a die-hard Liverpool fan responded with "Ba Humbug!"