I find it to be quite fortunate indeed.

“The Tigers opened a four-game series against the division-leading Cleveland Indians”

Giannis has a better chance of getting a hit off a major league pitcher than the 12% of Twitter chuds who think they can score a point off of Serena Williams.

*Looks at picture of sandwich*

If ever an asterisk is deserved in baseball, it's throwing a perfecto against the 2019 Baltimore Orioles.

Beautiful.

So much for the tolerant left?

What if he makes a break for first, then thinks better of it, and comes back? Is the batters box a "base" under this situation?

I’m on board if Kyrie is forced to wear a sphere.

The snozzberries taste like snozzberries

Interred

I did *not* expect a Salute Your Shorts reference on a Deadsping UFC article.

*looks at the likes and comments*

“Yeah, the underage girl touched it, but I didn’t cum.”

*pops popcorn*

the number one cause of human death

My son can’t have soy (it geysers out the back of him). Beyond products are all soy free. 

“I fucked your mom in these sandals”

Yeah “nowadays” really has no business in that statement.

I *think* he’s saying that they care about Bregman’s safety, and that they’re going to do everything they can to make sure he’s ok before putting him back in the field, but it sure could be read as Hinch being a sarcastic ass.