Goose Gossage just went to that kid’s house and plunked his parents.

*Sports Pope yells at cloud*

Al Alburquerque approves this post.

I used to love Mitch Hedberg jokes, I still do but I used to too.

Failed businessman ticket FTW!

I look forward t0 the day in this league when a gay man can beat up his boyfriend and no one will care as long as he doesn’t get suspended too long.

The only proper retort to such taunting is “I only do what your dad showed me, we all know he’s the best anyway.”

Magnolia, Tropic Thunder. Those two come to mind immediately.

#5 I prefer this theory.

St. Louis fans can still look forward to STARTING the race war.

Wait, how is this not about Greg Oden again?

The shoulder strain is real, do you know how heavy those room service trays are?!?

The Pear Society of America does not condone this egregious misuse of their shape. Sandoval has reached pomegranate status.

Except for the fact that Bryce Harper, the unanimous NL MVP, was the leader in WAR, yes.

Is this C3Po’s dong?

Technically, when you pistol whip someone, your hands never touch them, so... ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Hitler didn’t have the internet and he did okay, just ask Tai.

How horrifying is Donald Trump? I actually care what Keith Olbermann has to say about him.

Don’t launch angry. Don’t launch angry!