Or maybe, The World, just maybe, it’s not so much that she’s a conservative (Abby Huntsman and Jedediah Bila are conservatives, and much easier to take), but that she is a remarkably unpleasant person to listen to and to look at. That second part has nothing to do with her “looks,” or her sex appeal, or anything like…

Calm down. Here, have some apple pie.

So...you and Jerry dated for awhile. Tell us- what was that like?

So...you and Jerry dated for awhile. Tell me - what was that like?

I smell a song.

I live on the complete opposite side of the country from California, so I must ask: are scorpions a common occurrence in Fresno? Because it strikes me thirty years later that not one of the kids comments post-scorpion that they just encountered a scorpion.

Can someone tell that chode Jim Jordan that it’s been cancelled, so I don’t have to hear him prattle on and on about the biased unfair SUCK YOUR OWN DICK JIM AND USE THE MONEY YOU SAVED FROM YOUR YELLOW TIE COLLECTION TO BUY A FUCKING JACKET YOU FUCK

Or we could watch the movie first, then hate it. 

This isn’t necessarily a criticism of any one person or movie...am I the only one noticing that every single movie that opens in wide release gets a headline from AV Club that, no matter the grade, seems to be equal parts positive and negative, for the most part? I feel like I haven’t seen a “Movie X is just plain…

I’m about done with umps. Power-hungry fucks.

Hello, Earth? I'd like to cancel my fucking television. And everybody else's, for that matter.

Hi David!

The Internet in twenty-nineteen, ladies and gentlemen: shitting on a keyboard for clicks.

Donald Sterling was forced to sell his team for being racist in private.

Caitlin....no.

I was doing fine until your kids walked into the room. Not that anymore details are necessary, but judging how I, also a surly father of multiple kids, had to quell the waterworks when reading this part, I’m guessing that day was a week long.

Because he looks like Hanks. Or...something.

The most insufferable part of Drake is that if the Raptors ultimately prevail in this series, every other headline will be about how Drake and his Halloween beard won it all for Ontario.

I’d like to throw in a word - nay, a howl - for An American Werewolf in Paris. How a studio could take a horror-comedy classic like AAWI London, drain it of all charm or suspense, and even completely negate the one thing about it that any casual observer of movies would remember - the transformation scene - remains a…