My uncle did and he said it was amazing. He convinced me that when you go to Vancouver, the mayor gives you a pet whale.

No statement from Rachel Ray yet tho? Suspicious.

The only way to get rid of insects is to hire someone to burn down your house.

Assistant to the Regional Sidepiece.

(Ulta could not be reached for comment)

you are doing the lord's work

Beyonce put out a bunch of songs and videos, many of which are about Jay-z cheating on her. In one of those songs she refers to the side chick as “Becky with the good hair” and then this woman, pictured above, who has been historically linked to Jay-Z, and originally rumored to be the catalyst for the infamous…

Had she not shouted “IT ME,” 94% of readers would have no idea that she might have been shaded in song.

Umm. Hi.

Not even when Princess Leia reaches out?:
“Help me obi wan snorlaxx octopit, you are the burrito consumer’s only hope!”

She DOES. She looks like the child of Kim Kardashian and Bert, of Bert and Ernie.

The local Sephora branch was closed for the day.
(She’s recovering at home quietly with an unnamed, lesser brand.)

She looks like she been infected with some strain of Kardashiovirus.

Edit: Hey Glenn, I meant this response for zimway2k.

I would seriously tell him, hey, I know you didn’t mean to but it really hurt to put myself out there like that and be rejected, and given our plans the next day I haven’t really had time to process it. I need a little time (a week?) to focus on me.

I have told this story a hundred times on Jezebel, so you may already know it, but it is no less true now then it was then.

Are any of you sheet mask devotees over 35? I need to get back into caring for my skin daily instead of randomly. I like peel-off masks for fun but have never known them to do a darn thing.

Gilligan OMalley’s seamless ones are my favorite, even over pricier brands.