Well, how cold does it get where you work?

Right?!?

Y’know, sometimes a single facepalm just won’t get it done.

I have an idea; how about fire her dense ass, then she can spend the rest of her unemployed life refusing spare change from folks she deems ungodly.

I might, if they hadn’t turned into musical notes. I can’t sing for shit.

That would make me... *sigh*... old.

I’m betting he has no memory of it; like Patton Oswalt said: “Pot makes stupid, boring people think that they’re fascinating and magical.”

Pretty sure she was a zygote in the 90s.

USA. Characters Welcome.

Always remember, children:

He most likely has spent thousands of... whatever currency they use in The Shire (Turnips? Boring anecdotes? Bits of wood?) to look like that. Every wisp of that strawberry-blonde atrocity has been carefully strewn by trained -and hopefully morose- professionals to make him look like Mumford & Sons tried to make love…

Nope; it’s just trying desperately to cover his true visage:

What a terrifyingly gleeful visage. How could this guy not be a savage criminal?

“It’s not as if you tripped and fell into her.. and then out of her, and then back into her again.”

This guy is so full of shit, you could dehydrate him and use him to fertilize a community garden.

A dog that comes with a hidden, bonus dog? That’s the best kind of dog!

Or just send him a dildo with a card that reads “Go fuck yourself.”

Because God is not nice.