Oy, that guy.

I’m even more sure he hasn’t had anything approximating a friend at all for at least 25 years. People like that wouldn’t have friends if they could.

The GOP’s base may not be... avid viewers of Rachel Maddow, but you can bet your sweet bippie these candidate’s backers are watching, and closely.

Influential, sure. Powerful, I guess. But Santorum could personally avert a catastrophic asteroid strike on this planet, and could still never dream of deserving an adjective like “important.” He is not important. He could drop stone dead from a stroke this instant, and the world would only be affected in the tiniest…

Is it wrong that I find the thought of her utterly ending Rand Paul -first politically, then actually- sexually arousing?

Don’t think of it as giving him airtime; think of it as giving him rope.

His middle name may as well be Massengill.

The backs of my eyes are now awash in brain puke, thanks.

I hit that. Meh.

I’m sitting here, snickering because you said “massive facial.”

I didn’t think Levine could look any more like a serial date rapist than he already did. Color me freshly fuckin’ learned.

Country-Western music is no longer produced in America. That warbling issuing through your lesser terrestrial radio stations is just pop music with a twang, straight from the San Fernando Valley equivalent of Jersey Shore “guidos.”

Because everybody loves Tom Hardy right now, and nobody loves Ben Affleck anymore. Or has since 1999.

I remember her as a mediocre, C-Level actress, mainly famous for her brief appearance in the first Sin City.

Poetry. This is the unfettered, clarion song of the human heart.

It should actually be far, far larger. And sky-written over every inch of this country, each day, until these vicious animals finally recognize their obsolescence.

The Hedgehog Abides.

I’ll be 41 soon; sometimes people call me “sir,” and sometimes people say I look younger than 40. It happens.

Best thing to do is slam the rock back down with all your might, again and again, until the crunching and squishing and screaming noises stop.

That’s alright; I once read a bit of their fancy book about magical superheroes, and it turns out they have a pretty effective contingency plan for humans who violate those principals.