Yeah, look for Sandler to pull something similarly stupid about how he can’t be racist because he’s Jewish. Then look for his publicists to scramble to their fire trucks and race to his Twitter.

And cocaine! Don’t forget; the people who decide what movies get made, and when and how, are constantly high on cocaine.

If you’re referring to Dana Delaney’s parts, then I’d opine yes.

If that’s Michael De Luca’s dog, put him in charge. Poor Mike has lost it.

I’m just gonna leave this right here.

I predicted something similar to this. You can now reasonably expect the leads to stage a daring but costly, Boxing Helena-style escape from their contracts. You can also now expect the sequels to go straight to DVD/On Demand, fully recast with severely reduced pay all around. Fifty Shades 3 will just be two teamsters…

No worries; personally, I wish I could take a shot that would make me forget I ever heard about Midichlorians.

Okay, I’ll bite, just in case you’re serious:

I’m guessing it’s something to do with Midichlorians. Vaccines cause those, y’know.

I’m hard-pressed to think of a more fitting penalty for these officers than crucifixion.

“This country doesn’t produce anything anymore, except porn and autistic kids!”

Also, all our American flags are mass-produced overseas.

KRISTEN LINDSEY...

So, Sammiches has always proudly borne the countenance of a total douchebag. No surprise at all.

Fucking hell; the look in li’l Ted’s eyes... bone-chilling. You can actually see him mentally tallying all the nurses he’ll strangle that Summer.

Jesus Shitsnacks; you really can't imagine how fucking sorry I am. Whatever the details, whatever the circumstances, I'd just take you to some bar and buy you several drinks. Wish to hell someone had done so for me.

Do you have Lucky Charms in stores yet? I could never get those without special orders from small grocers. Drove me nuts.

One by one.

Goddammit, she told me she was on the pill!

Mary Kay Letourneau Wants To “Return To Teaching”