*slow clap*

Hey what's up Matt, you should know I'm single mmkay call me

I'm more of a heavily heartbroken, bitter Jezzie, but I'll rejoice with you anyway.

Everyone take a moment and savor Leto's transformation with me, Jezzies. I was recently dumped by a stupidly hot man-child who styled himself largely after Mr. Leto (devastating in the pants department) and who more or less held Leto as the only man-crush in his life. He more or less modeled his life, look and music…

He did. That was a weird time too.

And then the 13th second was kind of sad, right?

I thought this was Karl Lagerfeld for a solid twelve seconds.

Looks like Karl Lagerfeld. And that is not a good look.

The couple that slays together, stays together.

the fuck is up with headlines today?!

Couldn't they have just said "no homo" after every bite?

I made a bong out of a novelty penis cup just so that guys would stop bogarting all my weed.

I think they were more concerned about putting penis (cake) in their mouths.

'The cake isn't going to leap off the table and sodomize you, if that's what you're worried about"

"Hi! Happy wedding day! here's an old used penis cake!"

In all honesty, that is one of the last things you want to be compared to.

I baked a really awesome penis cake for my sister's bachelorette party. It was awesome with hair and veins and pink cake with white icing. I baked two since the cake pans were small (or should i say average) sized. We only ate one, so I took the other one to the location on wedding day. I try to pawn it off in the…

He looks like a cast member of "Twilight".

i can't process that at all

What the fuck is wrong with people?