BUT WHAT HAPPENED WITH THE TWO GIRLS WHO LEFT HIS Q&A???

But I have to live in the world with the kids you create...is a reality.

I legitimately only found Beyonce in that picture by a process of elimination.

Godzilla doesn't exist? Prove it. Until I see evidence proving that there ISN'T a giant nuclear lizard lurking off the coast of Japan, I will continue to recognize it as a possibility. It's called using LOGIC and having an OPEN MIND.

Buffalo wedding = dull affair according to Dothraki standards.

Is your grocery store inside of a giant peach, by any chance?

First of all it is wrong because the G stands for "graphics". Secondly it is wrong because the right way is obviously the way I say it, with a hard G. Obviously.

He is wrong.

Soft g "gif" = show is dead to me. (2 minutes in)

It grebes me to sea such an auk ward pun.

They keep puffin out their chests.

It's fun to subpoena the YMCA

"Dr." Keith Ablow can ablow me.

If he doesn't get over his douche-baggery before the last petal on the rose wilts/his21st birthday, he has to stay a little beast forever.

I dunno. I think we'd have an epidemic of dead dogs on beaches if that were true.

Jessica, please consider this a request for an official Evening of Squee across all kinja platforms when this is over. With Denton's blessing, you get to scour the internet looking for nothing but things that are deliciously weird, delightfully heartwarming or just flat out fun.

Jessica, I am so proud of you for standing up for your site, your authors and your commenting community.

but as a woman, how will my employer know they can pay me less?

#humblebrag

5 Seconds of Summer = Fetch