For real. Sometimes I'll commit myself to eating an entire (1.5ish cup) container of cut fresh pineapple from the produce section, but by the end of it my tongue is super upset with my decision. I cannot imagine 2 pineapples in one sitting.

Two entire pineapples??? My mouth and tongue are basically covered in infected taste buds and canker sores just hearing about that.

Yeah, he literally did the #2 non-recommended approach: made an excuse for why he's not following the rules (ring didn't fit his lady)

He's like a shark—all teeth, with cruel, emotionless little black eyes.

put "loud sex noises" in the search field on Youtube.com. You're welcome.

Free of genetic disease? They have Joe Francis genes!

Whole Foods has awesome benefits (insurance, a yearly-replenished health-care debit card in the amount of your deductible that can also be used for alternative therapies if you choose, and store-level profitsharing with its employees, which encourages employees to limit shrink and build relationships with customers),…

It wasn't that peachy before Huy Fong though, what with dry climate and dust from nearby quarries everywhere.

I fixed the title of the article for you

I was being a bit facetious. I am a co-op guy and take a certain smug pride in supporting local growers ........................ ba-dum-tish!

Sometimes we get menstrual blood on our hands.

Also, we don't wash our bras all that often.

You-you do *wash* your hands when you get it on your hands, right? I mean I do. I just don't walk around with menstrual blood on my hands during that time of the month.

Here's a few lady secrets for ya:

Obviously the red moon is a sign of the coming of R'llor and his warrior Azor Ahai!

Little known fact: They are made completely from weapons-grade reinforced steel, and glued together with a combination of mermaid blood and the tears of her haterz.

I'm pretty sure Brazil nuts see her thighs and break on their own out of respect.

It's tough out there for white, middle-class, college kids on vacation....

Damn. Since Psych is no longer around, I wonder who the hell is going to help solve all of these cases.

SPOILERS. Don't say I didn't warn you all.