I hope he plays 'Love Take Me Down To The Streets' on this tour. It's my favorite Wings song.

The screen hasn't been invented yet that can contain his ego.

"He's spinning the ball on his finger! Just take it!"

They actually use it to blind pilots, and then they film the resulting plane crashes.

So what? Animation is built on plagiarism. If it weren't for someone plagiarizing The Honeymooners we wouldn't have The Flintstones. If someone hadn't ripped off Sergeant Bilko, there'd be no Top Cat. Huckleberry Hound, Chief Wiggum, Yogi Bear? Hah! Andy Griffith, Edward G. Robinson, Art Carney. Your honor, you take…

It's practically the definition of 'damning with faint praise'.

It's true, this man has no dick.

Still looks better than the Fantastic Four reboot.

[Donald Trump appears and says something that wouldn't look out of place on Stormfront, or your local newspaper's comment section]

Unlike Jagged Little Pill, Dave Coulier was never relevant and relatable.

Alcohol tastes great, makes women appear more attractive, and makes a person virtually invulnerable to criticism.

Cheerleader! So-and-So! What's-Her-Face! The-Ugly-One!

Some people need to go get an ice cream sandwich. Indiana Beach Crow needs to go get an ice cream sandwich.

Reed Richards Richard Impossible

But he does it with a gun, which automatically makes him an American hero defending the Constitution from Kenyan Progressive Communism.

He's no Tom Jane, but this seems like an acceptable choice to me.

“Hello, I'm Leonard Nimoy. The following tale of asteroid naming is true. By true I mean false. It's all lies. But they're entertaining lies and in the end, isn't that the truth?

Thousands of years ago, before Sigourney Weaver…

"And that's how the 1938 musical trainwreck Daddy's Boy ends. Mid-song, as their crew refused to continue working on the production. Coming up next, an encore presentation of Daddy's Boy. No! We had a deal!"

"Angel Newt, it's not like this is the first time I've had sex under a mystical influence. I went to U.C. Santa Cruz."