The plant died.

That means you only have a week to live.

Tom Brady is Snow White.

Ah, but does he even notice?

And nothing’s a thing in North Korea.

Even hair hates this fucker, and it’s non-sentient.

The appeal to and construction of ‘racial’ differences has always been about exploitation, which is a zero-sum game—you win or you lose. So much of Western society since at least the 1700s has been explicitly racialised, and since thinking zero-sum is an easy default for lazy human minds, that mindset is natural for…

It’s because of the protein content. They should just use egg whites. Any by “they should just use egg whites,” I mean “WTF anyway.”

He could have sold heroin given the likely meat content of McD’s burgers.

You may have noticed that we have a surfeit of devils that do quite fine speaking for themselves.

Pretty strange. What kind of racist thing can you say about Armenia?

Dedicated to Kaur:

So the funeral was open casket?

This is more satisfying than the truck thing that was supposed to be the most satisfying, so you need to re-calibrate your clickbait title generator.

Those are the seats for homosexuals, Jews, and people who can read.

A sign that says, ‘Punch me in the face’ is considerably cheaper and will function just as well.

How long does it take you to eat just one little kid?

Bet you had to re-tuck your shirt after that telling-off.

It’s fucking science.

If you can tell which way the pigeon is rotating you are either a genius or a psychopath