This is peak dad-on-the-internet. I look forward to emailing both Mort and Del Rio, who I assume have email addresses that combine their kids’ initials and birthdays.

One thing that might bear mentioning is many of the Twitter critics are former players: https://www.insidenu.com/2019/9/23/20879437/five-key-takeaways-from-northwesterns-brutal-week-4-loss-to-michigan-state#comments (links in article). But yeah, I’m sure it’s the internets and over-biting sarcasm that are the problem. 

I look forward to the day when the rulebook takes four pages to define a clap. 

Perfect, he can spend the week as White House Press Secretary and Sarah Huckabee Sanders can squeeze in a last-minute trip with with the family before school starts. Everybody wins!

Sounds like he's arguing a conclusion of fact and not of law. Good luck with that 👍/s

I’ve always heard paid on in the context of something being paid in part with further payments needed. Definitely a working class, Amtrak corridor phrase.

Imagine how many sixth-year graduate students they could have funded. For reference: https://dailynorthwestern.com/2018/05/22/campus/the-graduate-school-moves-to-limit-sixth-year-student-funding/

I mean she considers Iraq a success because we removed Saddam; the rest (i.e., a failed state brought about by a power vacuum) is just ancillary.

Secconndedd

Kellyanne’s women’s cookout privileges have been revoked.

Can someone please photoshop in Ray J?

In my experience at Culver’s you usually get the table after you order.

I read that as him being in the witness room, not open court. But Idk.

Ray can’t be an expert on removing God; he can’t even remove blood splatter from a limo.

I use the default, except using a woman POC for the doctor. Just doing my part for greater inclusion in the medical field. Could I be doing something more? Maybe, but my degree is in American studies, so maybe not.

But she lies [mumbling] Vince Foster!

Ah yes, when I get to see my dad’s cousin, one of Rockford’s top accountants.

I liked Hahn until he mentioned he doesn’t do abortions. When you’re the only gyno for miles, you don’t get to impose your beliefs on others, you just don’t.

A friend of mine works at Commerce. We’ll go out for lunch, they’ll shit on all the work they’re doing and their political bosses. Then, they go back to work.

A friend of mine works at Commerce. We’ll go out for lunch, they’ll shit on all the work they’re doing and their political bosses. Then, they go back to work.