I honestly can’t tell if you’re being sarcastic.

Counterpoint- he’s a walking anal fissure and moral cesspool that deserves all the scorn he gets.

Shaq warned us however that taking 2 Advils every four hours is bad for your kidneys, you should just take one every two hours instead.

surely this is the first time this group has said something stupid.

He has a point: that wuss Gordon Hayward would’ve played this year if he had used Gold Bond to re-attach his foot to his body and then rubbed some Icy Hot into it.

Heard that was the decsion-making process that led him to star in Kazaam

This is why I come to Deadspin, for stories like this! Thanks for sharing!

But what does “If you’re going to make it, you’re going around it” even mean? Is it just a snide way of saying ‘you won’t make the putt anyways’?

Dana Loesch- how much do you want to bet she jogs around her gated community in camouflage workout gear?

Imagine living in a world where a professional athlete doesn’t have to put up money to pay for the funerals of children who were slaughtered for the crime of going to school.

He didn’t have an English accent before the fight.

I think there’s a real point here. A lot of you were really hypercritical about the NFL’s terrible record with hiring black coaches and executives but did we ever consider they were doing it to protect those coaches’ feelings?

I bet he was sssstealing sssignsss.

The guy who loses his shirt is going to have a hard time explaining this to his kids—but only because they haven’t returned his calls for two years.

This pun was muffed.

Haven’t you heard of Ivy Tech?

feck it! sorry I was trying to make a joke about the how little feckin sunlight we get here .Shit I am so sorry.

It’s also confusing as hell for us Irish* people when Irish American’s start refering to themselves as just ‘Irish’  .

I’ve been sober for twenty years, so the stupidity is even more evident to me.

I have an O’ last name and while I don’t often spend St. Pat’s drinking alone, there is always ALWAYS grumbling. I salute your commitment to historical accuracy.