Sad, really. A generic, afterthought career with occasional periods of unintentional success and unbelievable luck, ending with a slow, clumsy, directionless amble into a mediocre sunset. Farewell, Eli. We hardly knew ye, because you were barely worth noticing.

Because last time, he threatened them with no pizza party after the game if they kept screwing up and that didn’t work, so he was basically out of ideas.

I honestly can’t figure out why any sort of ‘resistance’ movement has the teeth of a newborn kitten. Maybe it’s the sheer weight of the perversions today’s GOPers are foisting upon the country, like it’s ‘resistance exhaustion’ or something. Every day it’s something new, and fighting all of it is overwhelming.…

It’s good to see that there’s others out there who’re struggling with the realization of how all fucking surreal his presidency is, like where it’s one thing to hear the shit that comes spilling out of his maw, but putting the words with the image and circumstances just seems slightly unreal.

At the same time, we should be happy for ESPN, now that they’ve finally finished their transition from a sports network to a geisha organization.

Back in the day, Monday Night Football was invented to help gamblers recover from a disastrous Sunday. In a similar vein, Thursday Night Football was invented to cram even more NFL down the throats of people who were uncomfortably overstuffed with the whole goddamn enterprise and had no idea how to say ‘no’.

And suddenly, 7th grade boys, frat bros, MRA’s, and major Hollywood players quietly chuckled, as the psychic connection between all douchey types is strong and vibrant, and when one makes a shitty joke, the rest will respond accordingly.

Well, really, it’s not that bad. I mean, it’s not like the infighting and taking the path of least/no resistance actually caused any real har...wait.....

I remember thinking just out of high school that, just like Springer, this was the start of something great. But then several changes of major in college landed me at a career choice made based on a ‘eh, there’s worse things’ point, I discovered that ‘greatness’ required effort that I wasn’t willing to give, I made a…

Ms. Parker’s argument, however sincere, reminds me of that bird that I saw on that nature show a while back—the male entices the female by gathering bits of garbage and worthless shiny things and making a nest or whatever out of them, and if enough of the garbage-y baubles impress her, he wins her favor. That said,…

Good question. By not being all insulted and put-out by people not like them expecting equal consideration, maybe? Why waste precious pearl-clutching and tut-tutting time by actually enjoying life, y’know?

I like how the person was so sure in their convictions and the righteousness of their cause, they anonymously made their case with a passive-aggressive, after-the-fact mailing that would be more difficult to connect them to. Classy AND brave!

On a related, but slightly off-topic, note, I was reading an article today that basically said how calm Donnie has been in the midst of his latest crisis, and I was reminded again about how many fucking passes this guy is getting. It’s like playing sports with your kid, where you see them struggling and you let up on…

I once got a job working as a house supervisor from the 3-11 shift at a group/halfway house. I was a kid, a few years out of college and had lost my last job due to ‘politics, man’/being dangerously unqualified, and now here I was, trying to maintain order among people just beginning to readjust to life back in…

“Ken Giles has a role on this team...”

And around the nation, the cheers of those who believe Ann Landers’ advice is still good words to live by, who circulate glurge emails and completely fictional hoaxes about societal ills/the local weirdo/food and drink issues, and who claim that they’re ‘not a Democrat OR a Republican, but an AMERICAN’ (who think…

I like how the person who smeared period blood and contaminated the goods and living space of another human being (yeah, don’t even try that weak-ass ‘it was a joke!’ shit, kid) thinks they’re of a status so much higher than the target’s, it’s okay to do this sort of shit. Get lost, creep.

Scientists have recently uncovered the previously unknown Newton’s Fourth Law—for every tragic incident, Donnie will have an equal and opposite grandstanding, selfish reaction.

This is me, right after my workday ends. Yes. I’m that excited.

Anne Frank’s life was obliterated by the presiding governmental force, simply because of her religious orientation. This doesn’t seem to really represent the idea of the “peaceful co-existence of different cultures...”.