Do . . . you not know what your username is?

god, i've heard this lemonjello and oranjello story from like eight different people. either those kids really get around or—brace yourself—it's NOT REAL.

as always: "won't someone please think of the boners."

"won't someone please think of the boners."

Excuse me, Madam, but I don't have a boner right now from looking at you, and I've determined that I would if you smiled. So do it. Give me a boner right now. It's your job.

I thought this was a picture of Rainn Wilson from the thumbnail. That is all.

My fave is when funny guys won't allow equally funny ladies to be funny and will ignore or interrupt them. Or say, "Wow, that was actually kind of funny," in a surprised, worried tone. As the funniest person in the world, I see this endlessly.

Well, I agree, but Howard is reportedly "mortified" by her weight gain. It's not up to Jezebel to say it's OK to parade the pics around because THEY don't think there's anything wrong with them.

Also: Come on, Jez, take those photos down. This article's content is important, but it's almost totally negated if you then put up photos that are causing Howard so much anguish. Think.

Never have I more wished that I were a brain in a jar than after reading this article. Somehow, being a woman means that your body is automatically the entire world's business. All day, every day. I still can't understand why this is OK.

God, I hated being named Megan when I was a kid. I've shortened it to Meg, but still, there are a lot of us. Come on, Mom. How hard is it to think of a name that isn't in the top five. (My sister is an Ashley.)

I woke up this morning and was feeling kinda shitty about my weight, and then I thought about how other people might view my body in its current state, and I was blown away (anew) at the idea that OTHER PEOPLE think that my body is any of their fucking business. It's baffling. Why do people care about the health…

I'm seriously about to fucking throw up after reading the NYT excerpt; I couldn't finish the article. The world is so horrible.

I agree with you, but yanno, there's Sarah Jessica Parker and whatever. Some people style themselves with their middle names in there intentionally, but I kinda suspect that folks are doing the styling for Frances in this case.

Yeah, well my middle name is Elizabeth, but were I famous, I wouldn't expect the media to throw my middle name into every single mention. I bet you have a middle name too, but I bet you, like I, only use it for government forms and such. Dig?

As a Seattleite: Everyone knows that KURT WAS MURRRDERRRED

Q: Does Frances style herself as Frances Bean Cobain, or is it the media who does it? I guess there are lots of three-named celebrities, but I suspect that the media just zeroes in on the fact that she has a kooky, zany, madcap middle name. Anyone know?

Fuck everything about that. Now I'm upset that I didn't know about this godawful show earlier. I'm upset that I wasn't upset about it a long time ago.

I totally fucking sang "Tossed Salads and Scrambled Eggs" at karaoke last weekend (in Seattle) and we had to have that conversation. And nobody knew the answer, and then I had to get completely shithoused so I could sleep at night.

Was that not, like, the MO of the "Hipster Grifter?" Back in Williamsburg circa 2008? This shit is busted.