Hello, are you just waking up from a cryogenic sleep that extended over the past 3 years? If so, boy, do I have some things to fill you in on when it comes to the current political discourse in America. 

If you think white supremacists have valid points I'm doubting how progressive you really are. 

And the Rose City Riveters are just as ridiculous and fanatical as the Timbers Army.

I was kind of torn about the people in the hotel room next to mine a few years back . On the one hand, I was trying to sleep, but on the other they went three rounds, with a break in the middle for breakfast and reading each other funny things in the newspaper and laughing gently together. I was honestly happy for…

“Trump and Lindsey Graham” needs to be on there somewhere.

Honestly, a woman from work has both walked in on her mom banging the neighbor when she was in high school, as well as her husband banging his best friend’s wife a few years into their marriage. In fairness, she was also secretly banging the husband’s best friend as well. Catching her mom in the act messed her up way…

+1 I know I would.

+1 answering 'yes' so we can move on

If only Harry Caray had been there to ask him if he thinks the moon is made of spare ribs. 

“... he’s going to become President because he’s a celebrity.”

I so hope Keith Thurman puts Pac to sleep this weekend. If only then we can say that the era of two of the absolute worst human beings that ever strapped on a pair of boxing gloves (Pacquaio and Mayweather) would be over. 

Before BW3 changed their name, the third W was for weck.

To clarify, because the 70's were a confusing time, that is a White woman.

so many revenue streams created”

I’ve had this and its good.

“Who is the orange man?”

“who is the orange man?”

I used to host bar trivia in Chesapeake and Sweet Pea was a regular. He brightened the room anytime he was there, and didn’t care when somebody didn’t know who he was. But everyone knew who he was, because he was just that kinda dude. He’d just show you his championship ring, let you try it on, and be your buddy. He’…

And Lil’ Ben gets funded by hard-right advocacy organizations because he’s an outspoken racist fascist with a large Twitter following. So what’s his beef exactly?

Christ I miss Ferrell doing this bit. I haven’t cry-laughed in a while, so thanks for that.