Jesus!  He’s got a head like a mascot.

“Wow! That’s all I ever wanted!” -The Go-Go’s

Murphy temporarily deactivated his Twitter account after Tennessee fans gnashed their teeth at him online

It looks like he’s trying to cool off the boobs Djokovic gave him

blow, in my experience, is indeed good.

Let me get this right. This fucking guy decided to shoot people that weren’t Larry Nassar?

To be fair, it was a perfect triple murder with full layout into five pristine felonious somer-assaults.

“I didn’t want her to come anyway. ungrateful. Speaking of Coco and Golf, I have a world class golf course in Coco Beach. Beautiful.”

He could weigh in by saying he prefers McDonald’s chicken sandwich. 

Artie Lange once ran a 100 yard dash in an 80 yard gym.

That kid had learned that reaction when his dad, on “his Wednesday damn it,” sat down only to find out that they got “the only damn pregnant waitress in this whole Hooters."

Somewhere Sarah McLachlan just came on the arm of an angel.

Broke nose never killed anyone.

Just extend the fucking protective netting already!

Two squirrels in a row. Tomorrow's game will be invaded by a gray squirrel

Never mind Fultz. How did he get better seats than Nelson Mandela?

Out of respect, all local Taco Bells have ordered their flags to be flown at half más

The only reason these coaches are fighting is because of how vague and sloppy this rule is.

What the™ fuck?

He missed an opportunity to use "getting ran over by a Buss" for #59 on every list.