this species of tarantula is a protected species

Day ain’t over yet.

Yeah, but Virginia would then shoot him into the sun from that jail. 

This eminent scientist is on it goddess

Uhhh...isn’t that just a clump of frozen seaweed? Which, by the way, would probably be smelly. Am I missing something here? Is this like a blue dress/gold dress thing?

I usually keep a bottle of weed killer on the table to spray in my oatmeal if it doesn’t have enough Glyphosate, otherwise it has no flavor at all.

Again with the origin?  Everyone knows that dog was bitten by a radioactive dog, giving it the strength, speed, and agility of a dog-sized dog.

That’s just tinnitus.

Damn them avocado rustlers..

Between this, and the cartel-run avocado market in Mexico, we need to talk about “conflict avocados”, or “blood avocados.”  Maybe we can make a movie about it starring Leo DiCaprio.

Not one person is questioning why they would air Santa Jaws in August?

This is why it's important to keep your truck free of stagnant pools of water. 

I don’t see any reason why this wouldn't be a checked swing.

Loved the article. 10000% here for the comments.

It turns out the real American Sailor Moon Pilot was the friends you made along the way!

“Hey Honey, I bet I can smuggle 200lbs of uncut cocaine into the USA”

Those are definitely Pretty Patties

I have an important question that no one seems to be asking.

Pork Belly Burnt Ends Poutine