My husband died. I moved on eventually. Some British nobleman tried wooing me. I fell for him. We boned in a Liverpool hotel. He asked me to marry him. I said no, and then cut my hair short.

God, I SHOULD have said no. To the guy pre-Mr. Slayder who proposed to me in an elevator, after we hadn't seen each other in months. What can I say, he surprised me and my "shocked" response is usually "um, sure, okay."

I came back from the doctor and said I probably couldn't get pregnant without a lot of help - help I've decided I didn't want. He hugged me, said it was OK, and asked me to marry him. Right there, in the hallway, with a litter box not 2 feet away. I said no.

We were both 22 (he was maybe 23), and it was February, time for responses to grad school applications. We had been dating (the kind of dating you do in college) for about a year. He received his acceptance from a prestigious design school in the NE that morning, and evidently spent the day romanticizing/fantasizing…

When I daydream about my future-engagement, this is exactly how I imagine it goes.

I have full confidence that my boyfriend would tell me I look fat if I asked him such a question. #notallmen

Observe as we make this zany-ass ad to try to get you to forget that you've been buying the same brown turtleneck and jeans and sparkly flats for the past fifffteeeeen yeeeeeeearssssss. #bringbackfreshcutgrass

I can't watch YouTube at work, but does it have something about how Gone Girl is clearly set in an alternate universe where allegations of rape are immediately taken on face value?

I squirt. It doesn't smell like pee. It has no color. One time a little pee came out and it was noticeable. Because it smelled. And it was yellow. But day-to-day it is clear, it doesn't stain the sheets, and it has absolutely no smell.

It's a fun little place for it now, isn't it? :)

I had a Mirena... Till it failed and I ended up with an ectopic pregnancy :/

My thoughts were more like...

When Rachel bribes/blackmails Chandler into staying in the handcuffs by saying she can be "very generous or very stingy," my dad asked me to explain the joke to him. I declined.

Speaking of Gilmore Girls and Friends, remember when Phoebe dated Christopher?

I have to say, it's shitty that the Oregon players are receiving more punishment than the rapist in this situation.

I once went out with a guy who said he was a writer, and since I'm also a writer, I asked who some of his favorite authors were. He said,

"I shall avenge you!"

I'm more concerned that I have to be literally near death to be referred to a specialist. There are countless people on my Rez with chronic medical problems that require a specialist but we are under a life or limb policy. So basically these people need to wait until the condition worsens and becomes life threatening.…

YOU ARE GETTING IT.

k? I was just baffled by what soup you were eating it with that is composed of 2 ingredients, "neither of which are meat."