As a Scorpio I must inform you that this list is upside down, and you shall suffer my terrible vengeance. When I get around to it, I do things on MY schedule. *Dons cleavage bearing top, eyeliner*

Anyone who suggests eating baking chocolate is a monster. 

Ritter makes Hershey bars taste like a candle. 

You leave my favorite SNL skit ever alone! Swarovski Crystals!!

Maybe it’s in the Sergeant Pepper’s Cultural Appropriation dungeon with the rest of her fashion crimes. 

Bur do they....dance?

By the same age as X AE A-Xii, German babies are already eating with a spoon and managing train schedules with incredible efficiency. At 2, they begin smoking filterless cigarettes, dressing in all black, and pondering the meaningless of existence.

Did everyone else in the world realize how close Apple Martin’s name is to Apple Martini before today? I feel 16 years late to this joke. I’ve been walking around laughing at the name like, “Yeah. Apple. That’s a bad name.” But not understanding that what’s really bad is its proximity to a questionable cocktail. I…

Ugh, right. This is his artisanal hobby baby

“enough to startle one, momentarily, away from whatever sexual preferences existed before and briefly replace them with a sexual preference for David Tennant and David Tennant only.”

Short answer: USA

He was unBEARRRABLY sexy as Kilgrave. Yeesh.

Just over here waiting for someone to call BS on everlane. 

Is it me or is Rowling using basically the same illogical argument the anti-gay marriage crew uses: essentially, that giving legitimacy to others somehow lessens your own? All those assholes in the CA Prop. 8 battle kept moaning that their marriages wouldn’t mean anything anymore if gay people could get married too.…

Same. Imagine the cool designs he’d make in the latte foam!

I’d say 1998, judging by that bandage dress.

Is this knock off Lilly Pulitzer? 

No. Cream/ivory and black all the way.

You’re quotation conveniently leaves out the crucial part of the quote:

Fuck you