Hope Solo light.

“I spend so much time thinking and I don’t generally have, like, strong emotional reactions to very much.”

+1 square of Imo’s pizza.

A giant bubble of snot came out of my left nostril when I tired to quietly laugh at my desk.  Thank you for this.

Tennis Player Cramps, Pukes, Perseveres, Cramps Again—

Olsen looks like Jocko Willink with Laird Hamilton’s haircut. Instead they made him look like Michael Pena if he moved to the Ozarks and developed a meth habit.

Candy wrappers and seashells? Earl Thoomas has a weird diet I guess.

As the young kids say, I am truly pwned.

I maximize the function of my mitochondria with supplements such as NAD+, Acetyl L-Carnitine, Magnesium, etc. This helps promote ATP and it’s incredibly visceral.

Her beliefs may have been based upon her ownership of a set of Spaceballs: The Bedsheets! and a working Spaceballs: The Flamethrower!

This is good late night kinja.

I think that part of the message only appeared on the Papa Roach app.

People who workout while listening to music on their phone with no headphones are feckless bastards, right?

-1 eye

Uh... A for effort I guess?

I bet you’re fun at parties.  And dinner dates.  And picnics.  And roadtrips.  And breery tours.  And family get-togethers.  And block parties.  And poker nights.  And casual brunches.  And movie nights.  What I’m saying is you’re a giant dicknose if the first place you went in comparing Red Sox/Yankees was Nazi…

It’s a close race between Ancient War Goblin and Theranos Board Member but in the end, the latter takes away from the disgusting things Elizabeth Holmes did. By which I mean routinely speak with That Voice.

How is Mrs. Bielema doing these days?

Holy shit.