Karate roller sports would be a must watch.

Seeing how hard he’s throwing at such a young age, I’m assuming his name is Tommy John.

When the reporter turned to Marshawn and asked him what his mother’s influence meant to him, he answered “I’m thankful”.

...former Northview manager...watching two horses get to work.

As out of touch as he seems, let’s all remember that he did get three players to the finals this year.

If these ransom notes become the norm, Cal Ripken Jr. will finally be able to silence his critics who think he doesn’t have the right experience to be a manager.

That’s probably a good idea, it’s the point where it could very well be patient zero for Ebola.

But even now when my phone’s dead and I resort to a magazine, I can’t get over of how big it is, and the necessity for two hands at times, it just throws off my whole rhythm. Don’t get me started on bringing a newspaper in there, you might as well opt for a giant Rubik’s cube.

If he was pinching a loaf, totally acceptable. We’re an evolved species, we can’t be taking a shit without a viable form of digital entertainment like some sort of wild animal. A phone in my hand is a biological requirement when it comes to bowel movements.

If he gets this mad over softball, imagine how he must get over the real sport he plays...fantasy football.

In Doc’s defense, he admitted that Austin was a huge mistake, but he still stands behind the signing itself.

He clearly can’t poncho his way out of a plastic bag.

Which means that the walls around your toilet entire fucking house may very well be are covered in shit.

No words to describe it.

I like my passwords like I like my martinis, dirty.

If I’ve learned anything from following Kelsey Grammer’s career and watching Frasier, it’s that Cranes are always higher than they appear.

“Declare their love for the CoCo one last time”

Usually too many subs angers my deuces as well.

Close your phone. Close your computer. Relax. Throw your possessions in a lake. Walk the world. Until then, shut up.