And that, kids, is how a NY snow cone is made.

A washed up Ronaldinho = beached dolphin.

Clark was charged with first-degree misdemeanors for domestic violence and assault after an incident with his then-girlfriend, Diamond Hurt...

Our boxers are as doped-up as our racehorses.

He probably should have asked Oscar Pistorius instead.

He’s gonna have a hard time covering up that lame ‘Durmond’ tattoo now.

True enough, they would have been awesome in the early 2000s.

Of all the shitty signings he has made, Jagr was not one of them.

And Jacob’s a realist. You go to prom with a female friend who may be kind enough to let you have sex with her. You don’t go thinking this woman’s uterus will one day hold your waste of seed. I can’t wait to impart this kind of wisdom on my own shitty kids one day.

True equality will only be attained when a gay man musters up the courage to propose to his partner at a baseball game. At that point, they will have become as insufferable as the straights.

Reporters who voted for Curry aren’t dealing with nearly as much shit this morning as those who chose to eat it.

Are we sure he went undrafted because of the murder investigation and not Roger Goodell’s inability to pronounce La’el?

+1 madeleine.

I hope his next fight is with Parkinson’s.

I grew up playing for a Little League team that was made up of kids from both the richest and poorest neighborhoods of our city. As odd or as sheltered as it may seem, Little League baseball was my first introduction to inequality, and my first lesson in acceptance (real acceptance, not the Christian variety), and I…

Pictured: The 49ers unveiled their new alternate uniforms universe last night.

The only time a Trout is a significant upgrade over a Salmon.

“Such a perfunctory steak. Where’s the passion?”

And yet for all their issues, they still somehow get better numbers than NBA/NHL playoffs.

I’m Canadian and I’ve never heard of this league. Next you’ll be telling me we have our own football one too.