The white are pineapple, a lot of people don’t know that. When I go to the dentist, they say, do you eat candy and not brush enough?  And I say yes, that’s why I’m here. Now get back to work, I’ve got a bag of swedish fish in the car and its getting hot. 

Damn, this was me for a while. Well, it still is, I’ve just found my harm reduction in the form of dark chocolate. That 70% dark bar from Lindt is a godsend... just sweet enough to get the sweet tooth fix after dinner, robust enough that I only need a couple squares, but low enough in the worst parts of candy (fats,…

We are the same person, only minus the “All I need is just a couple fun size bars or a handful of bears and I’m good” part because I will absolutely get the 3 lb bag of Haribo bears at Costco with the intent of having a couple small handfuls a day and having it last for weeks, only to tear into it before I’m out of…

I’m a sad person.

Putting clothespins on power cords to save money by keeping electricity from escaping as waste is one of the stupidest fucking things I’ve ever heard. If people who believe this have kids that go to your kid’s school, you need to find your kid a new school.

The Ravens have always been pretty forgiving with that sort of thing.

Not to mention the Klan was founded there.

“Dear Diary,

I need to get into the minds of blacks so I can better understand them. I have decided to put on make up and become one for the day. I’ll report my findings shortly.

Papa”

Take a breath my friend, everything is okay. It isn’t Packer fans who decide on contracts.

AND LIKE THAT.....HE’S GONE

I went to college in Wisconsin and you are 100% correct. Even in the 90's when they had Barry, were going to the playoffs and actually won a division the Lions were an afterthought. The Packers fans would play “The Bears Still Suck” after games (8-0 against them when I was in school), Vikings fans would be vicious…

As Patrick Reusse wrote about Bud Grant, he got to the NFL Hall of Fame by coaching against the Lions twice a year.

Also, I couldn’t see it from where we were sitting, but that pitch to Rosario that is embedded above is the same pitch Mauer took looking for strike three in the second. High 90's four-seamer boring in on the hands, above the belt, that appears to tail back over the inside corner of the plate. That’s just a filthy…

35 of 52 pitches for strikes. 16 were foul balls.

Exactly. It’s the little things like that that I think people fail to consider. 

Well, speaking from experience, it’s generally easier to wait in the restroom when you’re in a wheelchair. Just because the floors are *so fucking gross*. I personally would rather sit in the bathroom than having to keep touching my wheels to get around.

Dude. If you gotta go, you gotta go. I don’t speak for the ‘disabled community’, nor do I want to. That being said, I would completely understand if someone ablebodied was in the handicapped stall. They *are* legit. Plus, I like feeling ‘normal’, you know? And there’s nothing that’s more normal than sighing and…

or just go pretend you’re bradely cooper in the elephant man

The ole Larry David routine, eh? I’m horrified but respect you for watching that episode and going “well maybe he’s on to something”