The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt did a story line where NFL teams all changed their names to controversial topics to goose merchandise sales by people burning jerseys to protest.

My favorite was “The Seattle Oatmeal Raisin Cookies You Thought Were Chocolate Chip”

THIS! Raisins are bullshit because they hide as chocolate in cookies, muffins and bagels. If I know it’s a raisin, it’s okay. But if it’s a surprise raisin?! I’ve legit thrown a whole bagel minus one bite in the trash. I’m a monster and I don’t care.

Johnnie’s is an all-timer.

Who directed the “Whatcha gonna do? Bite me with your snaggletooth?” scene in Little Nicky? Because that is the winner.

Sounds good. I’m in.

I love that TO is skipping the induction, but hoooooly shit it would have been funny to hear him mercilessly mock Jeff Garcia and Donovan McNabb for fifteen straight minutes.

We’re in agreement that it is an INCREDIBLY T.O. move.

I am inclined to agree with you. I don’t know enough about football or Owens to say how aggrieved he is.

Sesame street after hours. This is an incredible story.

I am crying—tears pouring down my face—as I try to suppress laughter from reading about your Sesame Street tag team match while at work.

This is incredible.

Yeah, I would like to know the origin of all this public führer.

You’re on fucking fire today.

Damn it, man. You posted this 20 minutes after the thread opened, and we already have to close the thread.

Thanks, my office thinks I am insane. Elmo raining blows and being pissed, WTF hilarious.

The story was good. Pictures included? Make it a masterpiece.

I’m sitting here at my desk laughing maniacally. People are looking at me funny.

If you haven’t seen the Bert and Ernie version of Warren G’s Regulate, it’s more or less the perfect soundtrack for your story.

This is the greatest goddamn story I have ever read and I am sitting in my classroom giggling and my first graders are asking what I am laughing about and I can’t tell them.