Clearly a better corporate fit for Adidas since he spends all day dreaming about sex.

I’m assuming “no one” means that whoever was on at 0:43 in the first video is some sort of cyborg or something because holy shit.

I would have thought a guy with Skipper’s checkbook could afford a higher class of pharmacist...

You consistently make me laugh, I just want to say thanks.

That’s my takeaway from this as well. Dude’s coke dealer seems to be a total asshole. Rich people in CT should have access to better dealers than this, right? Christ, Skipper, next time just ask your kids for the number of whomever they’re using.

The fans would also decide to call the format “Playoffy McPlayoffface”.

Fantastic comment, front to back.

Bloody outstanding. Simply brilliant!

Oooh, colonial burn. Nice.

Whoa . . .

Having done a fair amount of work in central Illinois, I feel like the major difference between farmers and myself is how interested we are in discussing weather. Which I get there livelihood depends on it and all, I just can’t.  

We should definitely attack all Seahawks fans, just to be safe.

+ 12th man

If that’s how you feel about a player, how do you reconcile your fandom with the political views of the owners?

Jesus. I am laughing against my will but I am also genuinely upset by this joke. This is the perfect dark joke. Goddamnit. Just. Jesus. Just... ugh.

Seagulls are flying bags of shit.

Dr. Mitchell, pictured:

Masterful. Well done.

Four stars just like the Chicago flag Matt has hanging above the beat-up couch in his living room next to a John Belushi poster.

Bravo. Exceedingly well done.