hemmerlingformitchell
Hemmerling for Mitchell
hemmerlingformitchell

I’m just gonna stop now because i don’t know where we go from here

A slice is for a mudpie

You’d think someone with a giant ass and infinite wealth would be better at picking out baked goods

Buddy, I can call Ty Cobb anything I want cause that dead mother fucker isn’t gonna do a god damn thing to stop me. He wouldn’t drive on roads paved by the Chinese. He hit Guatemalans with tire irons for fun. He tucked his weiner back at least twice a day because it made him feel alive.

Gotta think Ty Cobb is on that list of enemies too, cause the whole Jeter being of mixed race thing. 

August 16th the spicy chicken nuggets are back babaaaaay

*slowly velcros back on shoes and shirt*

Hello fellow Bears fan and fellow Athletic subscriber.  We have 2 things in common

hell yaaah punfun

eat my diiiiiiiiiiiick

fooooooooootballlllllllllllllllllllllaghdsl;kgndgvhlbgdg

fuck you, my team has no kicker

go away, you fuckin weiner 

shut up

The Raiders also gave the Bears a 2nd round pick because just trading a future Hall of Famer alone wasn’t Raidersry enough

also it was later shown on video evidence that she was farting underwater, propelling her body forward faster and leaving her competitors behind to deal with wandering fart bubbles

And that’s my main take away from all of this is too.  There were so many times where he understands that his best course may be just to leave it alone and go back, even though he sees it as pointless (because no passport) and that he’s going to be a martyr.  Just so misguided and stupid and pointless and just a

grammar bitch

I gained some after reading his journal entries. He was someone’s son and brother, just a real goddamn selfish and reckless decision

Yes, it’s still funny, although his journal entries acknowledging his probable death and eventual goodbye note to his family are more than sobering and he was a passionate, albeit misguided, young man who probably shouldn’t have tried to give the islanders a fucking barracuda as a gift to eat, because it’s a fish no