Sir, I will make quick work of you and then impregnate all the fertile women of your household.

This is how I felt for the majority of my life. I would pick meals apart to take out the bits and pieces of onion, raw and cooked. At times simply refusing to eat them. As i’ve grown up, I have an appreciation for the onions place in cooked food, as long as it is chopped small and cooked down, it adds needed flavor.…

I am not an onion hater, unless they’re raw...get that shit out of here, but red onions are a fucking plague. Just one of those foods that sends me into a full blown meltdown, mayo included. If I see them in the menu, I request they fuck right off, but they always manage to leave them on. So many bbq chicken…

I’m pretty sure you didn’t visit his kinja discussion page and see the other comments he has been making, like I did. Carry on though

You get ungreyed when people who are better than you, like me, comment on your post and pull you up into the light.  Enjoy your time up here, it won’t last, you lil grub you

Larry has been trolling on Deadspin all day for one of 2 reasons.

i am very sorry

pwease don’t eat me, Mr.  

I did some quick research to make sure that cats were still consumed in Korea before making this comment, and they are, although it is decreasing among the younger population, it’s still a traditionalish dish for the old folks. Korea is also known for being horrible to cats and dogs regardless, so I don’t feel bad.

Maybe they tried skinning it from the tail end the first time and were like, “well fuck, that was just about the worst thing ever. I am scratched to shit, neosporin hasn’t been invented yet, so I’m probably going to die if these scratches get infected. God, I think I would actually welcome death right now, I don’t…

A vendor is going to lose his job over this

From what, the biography of Ted Kaczynski?

So what you’re saying is that he’s a fucking dickhead. Got it

Dark Horse Candidate

It was the shocker, and was actually 3 fingers, the two for the pink confused Eli who thought it was just one big finger.

Sir, I am not the author of that tweet, you can tell because if I was Matt Oswalt, I would sign off every comment with “Ratatouille is my brother”

I am very proud that so many of you do not like jokes of this nature and I hope you all will direct your energy towards fighting this awful decision to cut funding instead of writing comments at me telling me how this is wrong.

They’re 9..... Just pick’em up off the car and toss’em into a pond, or a bush. It’s Australia, that would totally fly. The children are the descendants of convicts, let the wildlife of Australia have them. Drop’em in a ponder or river, Salt Water Crocs and bull sharks baby. The bush? Well, get ready for a Brown or…

how about you go fuck yourself