Well, you do have to forgive him for wanting to watch all that Baseball and Basketball. I mean, the Knicks, the Mets...he just likes hanging out with other folk that haven’t done anything worthwhile since 1973.

They obviously didn’t think that the critic was objective enough in his reviews and injected too much of his own opinion.

“Here, we see a server remove the packaging from a frozen cheesecake that arrived on truck this morning to be thawed in a cooler. And so begins and ends our tour of Obscene Selection of Cheesecakes.”

Raise your hand if your middle name is Marie. *raises hand*

I just wish they would stop cramming so many hops into it. SO. MANY. HOPS. There are other flavors in the world, craft beer nerds!

Adam Sandler is to Mel Brooks what a beer fart is to Beethoven’s 5th.

Hey Bud Light, it’s your shitty beer that’s supposed to be absolutely tasteless, not your advertising!

I love how when people destroy property because their sports team won, sports team lost, or because of a pumpkin festival, they’re just “rowdy fans” or “revelers”.

So Rosencrans gets a response that’s equal parts guilt & stern.

If men are supposed to be better at chees then why the is the most powerful piece in the game the Queen?

I grew up around a lot of really old people. Some of them had been married forever. Almost every woman I had known was a stay at home mom, a nurse, or teacher. But all of them were married. Not all of them were happy. Divorce was still a little scandalous. And once these ladies’ husbands died either through heart…

She's got her center of gravity lower and is braced stronger than the girl in white; also, she's already got her hips in front. She's already won.

Yes our chapel was tiny too! Plus my grandparents don't travel, so they could watch. My father was ill and couldn't come, so he got to watch. And my co-workers put it on in the office and they and some of my students got to see as well. I thought it was pretty cool.

You’re right, I screwed that up, and I’ve corrected it above. My apologies for accidentally implying the Chargers were capable.

This doesn’t make sense. A team that needs to rebuild can’t afford to give up the picks and players necessary to trade up into the top five. I don’t see it happening, unless the Chargers front office is composed of idiots.

Look forward to reading your stuff. Cheers to you not having a secret live journal calling Spanish a ghetto language.

You're supposed to use a red duck and impact font for bad advice, remember?

No I’m not talking about Manhattan. I’m talking about NYC. The whole thing. I have lived in every single borough, across a whopping 11 neighborhoods thank you very much. Many of yesterdays poor/middle class outer borough neighborhoods are quickly becoming Manhattan II, III, IV, and V. And to say the poor “haven’t gone…

"...if BuzzFeed's constitutional cynicism were a body of water you could drop the fucking Burj Khalifa into it and be a breeze of dust motes on the far side of the universe before it hit bottom."