This is the third time Yordano Ventura’s been involved in something. It makes sense that it get blamed on the common thread. Raylan Givens is right - if you run into an asshole in the morning, you ran into an asshole. If you run into assholes all day, you’re the asshole.

“I am the Great Cornholio! I need BP for my Fungo!”

How did you miss Lorenzo Cain as ‘The Great Cornholio’?

Lot of fans won’t remember this, but Yaz knocking over a Kansas City A’s coach was actually what sparked the Impossible Dream.

“You know, Jeff Samardzija is from Indiana and he’s the best cold weather fighter in the month of April I’ve ever seen.”

Hawk then spent the next inning and a half talking about his own fighting career, including the time in 1969 when he took on three Yankees by himself. Punched out Munson with a right uppercut, yessir.

Are you not a visual-auditory learner?

After I saw you on “Chopped” I concluded you were the whitest man I’d ever seen. Now you tell me you walk around the house with a tennis racket? You’re the whitest man anyone’s ever seen.

Good point, Greg.

Anyone who calls this traveling can die in a fire.

Cubs W. Hawks W. Bulls W. White Sox L. Perfect day in Chicago

And for the record, Edmonds’ catch is 1,000 times better because Hawk Harrelson is not involved.

But they’re not actually watching the basketball. They’re projecting their platonic ideals of amateurism onto the action on the court.

Condones cannibalism. When you think about it, Samer is a lot like the Magnar of Thenn.

You're welcome

Huh. I thought Gatorade was produced in a Lab.

Hmm, I think I'd struggle the most with the 300-meter run. The metric system. It gets me every time.

I guess the bright side for Kentucky fans is that this loss preemptively saves the disappointment of vacating the title in a few years.