Worst answer to "So, does she have a type?" ever

You have to give her SOME credit. It's hard to make it in journalism these days when you're secretly a cat with a lime on its head.

Yeah, I don't have any kids and I hate vodka but I would be happy to be a Vodka Mom ally.

Chicken salad made with oil...

I feel like the headline for this story should have been, "Chicks dumped by dumped chick."

GIMME IT

We had a cat when I was growing up. He adopted us, he was indoor/outdoor, and he was near perfect - never went on the table, very affectionate. His only flaw was how much he loved to leave mouse-offerings in our backyard.

you think pet owners should have tens of thousands saved up for their animals' health problems? Really? Gobsmacking. Pets only for the rich, says this person.

Of course, that would result in most pets never being adopted in the first place, and a whole lot of younger and healthier animals getting euthanized as a result.

From my point of view - better that I adopted my cat from the county shelter and gave him several years of a happy and healthy life. If I can't afford…

I've never drank one of those vile Monster drinks, but that's certainly what it smells like.

The first guy might be a dummy, but at least he learned that he likes Indian food! And he didn't sound unpleasant by complaining that it didn't look like Italian food during the meal and subsequently making the manager's life hell. It's flabbergasting but still a positive in my book!

multiple people allegedly walked in on bride and groom Jessa Duggar and Ben Seewald fucking immediately after the ceremony.

feelin goooooood on a wenzdayyyyyy

I'm a black woman, and I don't need to hear about how brown sugar gets an old fat white guy off. We heard it for centuries, unfortunately most often at the receiving end of a weapon. It wasn't funny then, and it ain't now, even if if the weapon is merely virtual.

Also, for comedy to push boundaries, it has to punch up - take on the power structure, not kick down at the oppressed. That's why Lennie Bruce made fun of the Catholic Church and how they horded money while locking the homeless out of churches; he didn't make hobo jokes.

please, keep trying to explain to us how humor works

As a friend of mine jokingly skewered the mentality of "PC" critics: "So what? We're just supposed to respect everyone now?"

That's not Tay Swift, its becky.