CAPS EASIER READ

Main Character: "I'm having a love affair with this prison matzah!"

Who says I've never been in a band? I actually fronted a seminal group called Frankie Goes to Hollywood, so, as we put it in our debut single: relax.

Did the kid look like this?

I liked the movie "Saved" where the gay kid was sent away to a camp with nothing but other gay kids and, um, well, he thought there were benefits to this.

Wrong. Studies show women like other women more than men like other men.

Rest in peace Trayvon, Mike, Eric and Tamir. Your mothers are courageous, strong and full of grace in their grief. Change: It IS gonna come.

he asked how I shaved my ass without leaving any stubble.

This was my reasoning for losing my virginity to my lame dorky high school boyfriend (sheltered film nerd, with rich hippie parents). The first time we fooled around and he grabbed my butt under my skirt, he asked how I shaved my ass without leaving any stubble. He now lives in Georgia doing the same thing he did when…

The Grand Jury made no such determination. All they determined was that charges not be filed against Darren Wilson, based on his testimony and the evidence presented by the DA.

Someone had to finish the job. May as well be him. It's just hair.

If you run into her in person and are having a normal adult conversation, then I think you could. Any other way is probably best avoided.

So like, right now for example. The Haitians need to come to America. But some people are all, "What about the strain on our resources?" Well it's like when I had this garden party for my father's birthday, right? I put R.S.V.P. 'cause it was a sit-down dinner. But some people came that like did not R.S.V.P. I was…

Seems like a nice gesture when you're taking a picture with some unemployed tourist.

Requisite

Nah, sorry, not buying it. The guy outside of Planned Parenthood (with a degree in divinity and a homemade sign thoughtfully positing the state of our world if Mary had aborted Jesus) said that it's scientifically proven that abortion causes breast cancer, depression, infertility, dengue fever, and restless leg…

In a just universe, homeless (but queer and larcenous) waif answers the ad, slips something in the guy's drink to make him sleep, then ties him naked to the bed. Then she and her girlfriend ransack his place, take anything of value, and find the PINs for all his cards. They depart after taking a few pics of him naked…