My avatar approves.

I completely read the second paragraph in the voice of Stefon. This trial has everything...jumproping penguins, human rocket launchers, my cousin Otis...

Hush Hodor. No more Hodoring.

yeah, you know what? hillary (hilary?) duff is beautiful and probably a perfectly lovely human being. or at least her facial symmetry is tricking me into believing this.

"UGH YOU ARE NOT HELPING!" is something I yell at Dawkins' twitter account often.

Why oh why must he be one of the most public faces of atheism?! Dude, you are not helping!

Here's a bonus tale of billboard vandalism. I've told this story before on Kitchenette but this time I have a picture, which is worth a thousand words.

Sean Bean strikes me as a guy who really gets into his character. This doesn't surprise me at all.

You don't know how long anyone will be around at any age. You could have a child at 22 and get hit by a bus at 24 or die of cancer at 55. What matters when it comes to quality of life is the quality of the days you spend with people you love. What you're talking about is depriving your child of the quantity of life…

When I was a teenager, roundabout 1991, I got a job working at a James Coney Island in Texas. I had just moved there from Rhode Island. I had never heard the word jalapeño before, much less eaten one. On my first day, the setup was being explained to me, and my trainer pointed out the bin of jalapeños. I said, "what's…

he just told that guy to "kiss his shiny metal ass" in the classiest of ways.

so you're all for mandated birth control coverage then? or single payer health care? I guess you could be the type who views employees are merely replaceable widgets who don't deserve any kind of happiness, intimacy or life outside of work, because their entire existence is to make you money. You might even think…

"Oh, she wasn't just pretending"

it's weird because the sign is slutshaming rape victims but then her titty is also in the picture which makes me think I can't categorize her as a prude and those are the two categories we traditionally reserve for women. Maybe that's the point? She's using that dumb selfie to to destroy those archetypes and show once…

One day I was sitting on the bus behind a girl with headphones on with a guy started calling her "Blondie," and just generally telling her how he'd like to get to know her. He wasn't particularly crude about it, but it was clear his attention was unwelcome. But he kept trying, and she kept replying in monosyllables…

You're fucking despicable, you know that?

any future offspring may well get my last name to prove I can.

I'm a man, and I could train for 1,000 years* and still not be able to complete that course. That is one strong lady right there.