small businesses around america say they need help to survive in an increasingly hostile business environment, but let me ask my small business owner friends this: why haven’t you injected your employees with steroids and forced them to battle each other on top of ladders while wearing thongs?

Whatever you need to tell yourself, man.

All things considered, the event looks like it was a huge success. Nothing is better for career development than not working for the Browns.

The Browns did share five follow-up emails that they received from people who attended the event, in which they thanked the organizers and expressed interest in staying in touch regarding possible job opportunities.

Paying $100 to not get a job with the Browns seems totally worth it.

Exactly.

People who supported Trump based on jobs don’t understand how the world economy works. They must think he can single-handedly reverse globalization and return jobs to the US from China, Mexico, etc.

The culture of censorship surrounding unpopular opinions by the left has always been oppression.

It’s like the people that say, “both parties are equally bad and they both lie”. That’s like saying a bullet hurts, and stubbing your toe hurts. There are *levels* involved.

Is this in the Deadspin Hall of Fame? It should be.

The two ladies in my office. Both young moms of girls. One actually said (not paraphrasing) “well I didn’t like either candidate but my husband owns a business so, you know, Trump being a business man, it makes more sense.”

So it was a pushback against the “establishment,” huh? Then can you explain to me why nearly every incumbent Congressperson running was re-elected?

I am officially cutting anyone who voted for Trump out of my life (where possible) and taking the most extreme measures possible to socially ostracize the rest, from here on out. Fuck, fuck, fuck the shit out of these soul-less shitstains.

They were tarred as dumb racist idiots who were voting against their interests when they voiced their displeasure.

Said this elsewhere, but it bears repeating... Clinton, Obama, et al were right about one thing: this election was about what kind of country we are. And the electorate has decided: we are an asshole. Of the assholes, by the assholes, for the assholes. And now we have an Asshole-in-Chief. Van Jones is right, we are a…

Fucking protest voters. Great job, assholes.

“I bet he’d have two Super Bowl rings by now if not for MUSLIMS holding him down!”

I mean it as satire, but God help me there’s probably someone on Twitter right now saying that exact sentence.

Black boxes? Cover up? Where is Malaysian Airlines Flight 370?! JET FUEL DOESN’T MELT STEEL BEAMS!

But a certain faction of your uncle’s Facebook friends will swear he isn’t on an MLB roster RIGHT THIS MINUTE because of the war on Christianity.