"One last night to pretend this is a fairy tale"

I can't believe the dude didn't wait until after your orgasm to propose.

I work in a hospital. I would never touch a patient without cleaning my hands and gloving up, so why would I treat myself different?

IT COMES IN RED ALLIGATOR?! WHY DIDN'T ANYONE TELL ME!?

IT COMES IN RED ALLIGATOR?! WHY DIDN'T ANYONE TELL ME!?

Oh, there's already a pop star. She's the dark haired character in the picture.

As a happy bonus, humidification helps reduce cat static

As a happy bonus, humidification helps reduce cat static

I love my elephant! And I love the gentle burble he makes. I really missed it when the weather gets warm and wet again

I love my elephant! And I love the gentle burble he makes. I really missed it when the weather gets warm and wet…

Seriously, it's like the difference between fresh greenbeans, lightly steamed, and canned greenbeans, microwaved for a few minutes.

chicken pox might sometimes be no big, but shingles...

It's a little like Stockholm syndrome, I think. We've been imprisoned with this bullshitty behavior so long that the tiniest bit of not-horrible feels like good.

You are cool and awesome for noticing this, and should feel good about being you.

Someone needs to get on cloning stat and mix me up a hybrid Wierd Al/Bill Nye husband. OKCupid just isn't cutting it.

I tried a bandeau once. The back ended up at the nape of my neck and my tits ended up near my waist. Never again!

Oh my gosh, thank you for the tip! I have been putting off buying new bras for a long long time because it's so hard to find something that actually fits. My job requires a lot of bending and pushing, and my girls are big enough they count as women of their own, and - yeah. I used to go to Lane Bryant, but the one…

And for not knowing a damn thing about how to compose a picture. The color distribution on those dresses is poorly weighted, and the arm positions are awkward with how the women overlap.

Oh. So THAT'S the sound of my biological clock ticking.

with the toeses!

Whoa, whoa! If you're detoxing from alcohol, go to a hospital! It can be seriously dangerous to do alone, and there are all sports of rules about confidentiality. They can also point you at resources to use after.

"But...you're someone's mother" is the new "Won't someone PLEASE think of the children! "

They thought they'd look like the cool kids tripping a nerd in 1985. It'd go viral and everyone would see how awesome they were and laugh and laugh and laugh.