That’s The Ralph to you, friend. Show a little respect.

Vitamin B?

Indeed. As a Packers fan, I can’t wait for our turn behind the woodshed.

What do we even do with these? I mean, you gotta star it so it stays on top for comedic value, right?

I’ll first say that I agree with the firing, because my understanding is the document was written on company time, using company resources, and transmitted to some extent on the company network. That’s my understanding, but I haven’t heard from an independent source that all of those are the case. If this is the case,…

Not what he meant when he told his girlfriend he wanted to put it somewhere different tonight...

You starve it for weeks at a time, then let it gorge, that’s bound to happen.

I must be doing it wrong...every time I try to put my dick in my wife’s lower back, and she threatens to TAKE my car and house and move to Tahoe.

Pet ‘cause he’s a person of color who doesn’t conform to the liberal stereotype of how people of color are supposed to act/feel? Got it, thanks.

I’ve just been crushed to death under the weight of your dad jokes.

I still say this is subjective. Every time my wife asks me to buy large onions at the store, she says their a good size, but looks kind of disappointed.

Go ahead and rub it in, you rich prick. My family was raised on 50/50 ground beef. Shit had so much tallow in it, we’d use leftover slices as soap.

Great. First my wife ruins dinner, and now she’s spending all her spare time writing Lifehacker blogs under a pseudonym.

My wife is from Buffalo. Would it be domestic violence if I sneak up on her and body slam her through our dinning room table after they win their first game? Asking for a friend (who is me).

Dear Bert,

Replace white with black, and ask yourself if your statement is racist.

Sadly, it is. My father in law was convinced he hated brussel sprouts because his mom and my mother-in-law just boiled them. Now my seared sprouts with bacon, balsamic, and pink peppercorns are one of his favorite sides.

There was when I lived in Northern VA, but I’ve been in Milwaukee the last 10 or so years. GOD I miss the lunch counter at Super H.

You don’t mean to imply that Gizmodo Media isn’t right down the political middle, do you? :).

Would you feel different if “women” was replaced with “white” or “male”? Consider a scenario where a target for whites was set in order to increase representation against target demographic.