I was sneering and scoffing until I got to Sexy Seahorse and I wanted it so much.

BRB, going to see if that striped-shirt Gob Bluth lookin’ one is single.

I live near SF, that chart ain’t wrong about the rent, house, or coffee.

My cousin’s grandfather was performing that ceremony and passed out on the stage. We all worried about his life for about 15 minutes while he was cared for. Eventually he was rehydrated and feeling ok, but a pinch-hitter had to finish the ceremony. Still good wedding.

Was it from a flask smuggled in by a groomsman? Good wedding.

My friends had it as their wedding reading. I cried.

Was there food, that you could eat? Good wedding.

Show-and-tell: I’m making a game about running a hipster restaurant.

“If you don’t find love in six weeks, you’ll be turned into a bonobo...

I want some brave woman to date one of these guys, put a bit of bacon up there, and when it falls out during sex, tell them that that’s what a hymen looks like. “Oh, yeah, it’s supposed to smell hickory-smoked, that’s how you can tell I’m a for-real virgin”

If the sunfish is an example, your fish-drawing ability is god-like.*

True facts: sunfish were created from a drawing that God did in 2nd grade titled “my pet goldfiss”. God got a C-.

I’m a Santa Cruzian who was recently asked by a friend (who’d just moved into town) why nobody around here hitchhikes. I didn’t have the heart to send her this story.

No wet-shirt Mr. Darcy body pillow? FOR SHAME.

Safe (post)sex protection! Wear a rubber, or at least some galoshes!

Multi-year burner here, though haven’t gone in 3 years. It’s really amazing to see a fantastic fanciful city built over course of a week.

A rose by any other Dame wouldn’t smell as sweet.

I read that as beardown. I would be okay with her being smacked down by a grizzly or other large North American megafauna (revenge).

Donald Pleasance, Pumaman. I think we should give extra points for good costuming.

And then they were both killed by a lion, feeding a whole pride of lions and their cubs for many days. Hakuna Matata.