I do not understand why poutine is not more popular in the states. Fries good. Gravy good. Cheese good. What’s not to like? I can’t believe there’s not a poutine-equivalent of Shake Shack sweeping the nation.

Maple-flavoured corn syrup.

Hey you’ve reminded me that there was a girl in my elementary school who used to eat ketchup sandwiches! We were . . . pretty mean about it.

I am beginning to suspect this so called “supply chain” is more a “supply pieces of string that is worn thin and reaching its breaking point.”

Yeah, I made them into little pizzas and air fried them for 5 minutes? And I gotta say, they weren’t bad. The crust became much drier and cracker-like, but I’ve had worse pizza I’m sad to say. Definitely an improvement on cold pizza lunchables.

I am ashamed to admit I bought pizza lunchables on sale a month ago and could not resist air frying them and they were  . . . ok? They itched some primordial pizza urge for sure. 

There’s a weird assumption on DIsney’s part that all of your international travelers will have a lot of cell phone data to use.

This slide show made me realize that I assumed the Krabby Patty was some sort of seafood patty which in retrospect is really fucked up.

Could someone please explain to me how one shoplifts a steak? Seems awkward but I’m willing to try.

it’s “not as bad as it sounds.”

It’s fast food and I normally don’t care, but all I could think as I read this was “so these three items must contain a year’s worth of recommended sodium.” A clever plot to sell more Baja Blast?

Correct me if I’m wrong, but I believe McDonalds serves “frozen ice milk” instead of ice cream. 

Feels like a weird day to be celebrating America, guys.

usually eating it as they go, despite the signs?

I agree with using the sniff test, but I also use Best Before dates to determine which milk is the freshest. If I have a choice between milk with a BB date two weeks out versus a month, I know which one I’m buying.

It’s “there were plenty of vending machines” for me. 

I wrote it off and had plain white rice with plenty of water for lunch.

Sweetie, your first clue should have been when she complimented your moustache. 

Am I crazy or is this not the recipe off the back of the Kraft jar?

 . . . Does everyone not just throw stuff in their airfryer at 400 and check them after 7 or 8 minutes to see how it’s going?