I don’t know how your post managed to bring all of this crazy out of the woodwork. I thought it was funny.

How do I apply to be the local Janet at my post office? I frequently want knives when I am in there!

I now have tea up my nose and on half my desk. My coworker just asked if I was having a seizure. Thanks very much for this.

ooh, thank you, i’m going to try this! I love scallops but when I seared them with just a bit of olive oil and salt/pepper, i ended up with a weird, bitter/fishy aftertaste. Maybe marinating will help.

I never had to do it, but my brother had a version of this in middle school. His “baby” was actually a roll of paper towels with a face drawn on it. I remember how upset he was when my mom mistakenly used his “baby’s” “face” to wipe up a spill when he left it unattended when he went to the bathroom, and how befuddled…

oooh, talk to me about these scallops with blood orange <3

This is the exact reason why I have such an aversion to rice cakes now. A full summer of rice cakes + a teeny amount of reduced fat, off-brand peanut butter...partially because I was trying to lose weight in a particularly stupid way, and partially because I was pretty broke.

....well that escalated quickly...

OH MY GOOD GODDAMNED GOD. Why wouldn’t she cut her toenails on her own damned bed??? YOU would have been justified in locking HER ass out of the room for that bullshit, not the other way around. I don’t think telling your RA qualifies as narcing in this instance.

Lol. Might be the first time the mention of lice has brought about a declaration of love.

Sorry, you’re wrong on this. I have been hey’d by at least 1/3 to 1/2 of my past partners. The first time it happened, I was a little confused and I told my roommate about it the next day, and she was like, yeah, guys just say that sometimes after sex. My significant other now says it after most sexytime sessions. It…

I AM a hugger but only with close friends and family (and I’m trying to be more aware of hugging kids — sometimes kids do NOT want hugs and we as adults need to back the fuck up when that happens — children have the right to refuse your hugs and kisses, even if you are family!). With coworkers and acquaintances, there…

“I have lice” —> works like a charm :)

If he had made a direct threat against her, I wonder if he would have been legally penalized for it: http://codes.lp.findlaw.com/uscode/18/I/41…

I wonder —why is the AP reporting him as a “family man” in their headline? Is that some ploy to make him more humanized, or to increase shock value of his irrationally violent behavior...as if men who have families never have violent and deadly outbursts...?

INFORMER

I like the porn stand-in couple! They were super cute!

You know what? I had two super cute-meets with two previous boyfriends. The relationships, however, quickly devolved to crap. My current boyfriend is the most amazing person I have ever met, loves me exactly the way I want to be loved, thinks I’m beautiful even when I’m bloated from PMS and eating barbecue chicken…

Can confirm. Last time I was at the beach, I saw two separate instances of seagulls stealing food — the first was a bag of chips that was IN a canvas tote bag that the gull dove into and took...but no one was on the beach blanket at the time. But the second instance, the seagull (maybe a different one from the chip…

Yeah, cleaning up that mess was a horrible experience, and I never want to repeat it ever again. No more bulk flour buying for me, and also, all the airtight containers!