only if his head has made room for it, i suspect.

What you see here hinges on whether you believe that “Make America Great Again” is a dog whistle meant to unite racists, misogynists, and homophobes under one umbrella, or you’re delusional and don’t care about people who aren’t white men.

You know who else is bad? Everyone.

Still can’t get over the fact that Blake Shelton was sexiest man alive before Idris Elba. It’s not enough that black people have to be twice as good. Black people have to be ten times as attractive too. 

If it isn’t, I don’t want to be right.

I’ve, had, the time of my life
And I owe it all to Путин

That being said, she quickly added, “If you’ve already got the flu, I’m gonna pray for you right now ... flu, I bind you off of the people in the name of Jesus. Jesus himself gave us the flu shot.”

I’m morbidly curious what it is about the 12-month cheese subscription such that they couldn’t put the price there. Like the last three months are aged in a specific cave that requires hours of spelunking to get to?

A male feminist walks into a bar

I volunteer as tribute

Some of my happiest childhood memories are of playing with rusted out auto parts in an empty field across from my BFFs house. Zero adult supervision, sharp rusty objects, and even, one time, a cache of old playboy magazines that we studied with Talmudic attention. Keep the marsh open.

Alamo Drafthouse apologizes for Manpocalypse

Thank you. I’m going to start reading every Trump transcript like it’s Heather Graham and Julianne Moore having a coke fueled conversation in Boogie Nights.

If only there were some way to keep airlines from selling more seats than are physically available in a plane.

Wait what is this last one and why is it terrible.

“Looks good to us!”

Sofia definitely upgraded.

I can only wish for such arrogance.

I got dinner with a male man who wasn’t my husband lord master and then got diarrhea on the way home, so yes.