Covfefe® brand ginger ale.

For years, people have assumed ginger ale contains some magic power to turn an angry stomach’s frown upside-down. The idea being that the bubbles and caffeine kick your digestion into overdrive

My next door neighbors stopped mowing their lawn and WHOOPS NOW THERE’S RATS COMING INTO MY BACK YARD.

“I don’t use Facebook,” he said, his own penis in his mouth while - inexplicably - his head was placed up his own ass. “Congratulate me,” he smugly demanded.

JESUS CHRIST THERE’S ALWAYS ONE COMMENTER

She’ll be vibing some records

Plus, what if you have guests over? What if you’re hosting a party? Just how many butt towels will one need?

Okay but I would still use toilet paper to dry myself after all that.

GARMONBOZIA

Seriously! It’s great that the movie can stand on its own when divorced from a viewer’s knowledge of the series and that people can form their own opinions from it, but for fuck’s sake how can someone just automatically think MY SUSPICIONS WERE TRUE ALL ALONG when they don’t have all the facts and evidence that the…

Why does this reply not have enough stars yet?

I’m glad I wasn’t the only one doing that.

How would the person know if something’s an emergency or not if they don’t look to inquire?

No, it’s definitely specific people with the same first initial and last name as me. They’re easy to track down & chastise based on all the obvious demographic data I’m able to glean from the things they try to sign up for. My brother has even done it once before (he also has the same first initial).

The only thing I can think of that might explain why this is showing up for me is that people (specifically, idiotic people) use my email address instead of their own email address for things. First initial plus last name, even though it’s not their own email address, somehow confuses the shit out of people on a…

Oh look! Something I literally have no control over whatsoever and can’t change a password for since I don’t even have a password, nor have I ever applied for anything from T-Mobile to begin with!