I feel like...this Amber Rose business is going to play out like an episode of Arrested Development:

I was 20, on my way back to the US from several months living in Uganda. It had been a long trip with several layovers and very little sleeping; I was disoriented and really emotional about both the leaving and the coming home, wearing this ridiculously loud yellow outfit with puffy sleeves one of my friends had made…

I had been with a guy for five years, engaged for one when we broke up. He said he just wanted to be single for a while, among other reasons, and we mutually agreed that it was for the best, and would remain best friends.

Two boy-related ones:

A couple of years ago I was living in a second floor flat with my cat. I had the window open and the cat would usually chill out by the open window.

Can I tell a nice one?

I was teaching every day at this week-long English (as in ESL) business skills "camp" for accountants in Taiwan in some hotel. Every day was a new seminar on English-language business skills, like presentations, socializing, meetings etc. I was getting sicker and sicker with a nasty chest cold…

My biggest meltdown happened because my fiancé turned on the dome light inside my car. Yup, the dome light.

One Christmas, my family decided to pitch in and buy my uncle his ultimate Christmas gift: a pool table. My uncle is handicapped, so he lived with my grandparents, and they had the thing hiding in the basement until the *reveal* on Christmas day.

My husband decided to setup an aquarium with cichlids (predatory fish that eat other fish). He got an enormous tank, and two baby cichlids of different breeds - the idea was that they would each take over one side of the tank, and live in their separate "territories." However, the sweet little tiger oscar cichlid, who…

Mine has to be about the weekend me and my GF decided to come out to our parents. We were fifteen or sixteen and thought we'd been good about hiding it for a while, but got tired of it. Working up the courage was hard enough.

OMG now I feel like a star! A farting star!!! Can I not be grey now?!

it was my junior year of college at Syracuse. I had spent the year living in a TERRIBLE house. The warmest it got in winter was 50 because the insulation was so worn out. My roommates sucked. As in using other people's wash cloths to wipe their ass (and then hanging back up on the rack!) when toilet paper ran out…

Mine defiantly involved alcohol and a breakup. After finding out my bf of six years, who I was trying to have a baby with, was cheating on me with MULTIPLE people, I decided to let loose at a friends b day party. He had ended the relationship by skipping town and giving me a thank you card. A fucking thank you card. …

When I was helping my husband immigrate from England, I had the most wonderful meltdowns. It was incredibly stressful time for me without that- I had just bought my first house, was working a shitty group home job (60-70 hours a week), and trying to make friends in this new city I had moved to about 4 months prior.…

Probably too late to be considered but too good (pathetic) of a meltdown not to share.

Don't know if this will be seen because I'm sure I'm in the grays, but anyway...

I once got into a screaming, crying argument with my sister about proportional representation. I was trying to convince her that the U.S. Senate is a monstrous institution that ought to be abolished, and she was having none of it. I still think I was right, but there's no doubt that I behaved worse: she stayed calm…

I was pregnant with our 4th baby. I ordered a girl. Had the ultrasound and found out we were having a boy. No maybe. No it looks like. I very clear, obvious penis. Meaning we would have 3 boys 1 girl.

Picture me, a suuuuper edgy, gay, very fashion-obsessed 15-year-old atheist, starting a homeschool co-op knowing nobody. I walked into orientation and saw a few girls (most likely Mormons/Church of God/Jehovah's Witnesses) in FULL LENGTH CAMOUFLAGE-AND-ZEBRA-PRINT SKIRTS. I asked my mom for the keys to the car and I…

LOL! "Choose the form of your Destruction!" "Don't think of tampons, don't think of tampons..."