Why isn’t it called Dragon’s Den in America?

lmao at the idea of Nicki cooking and cleaning

lmao dem pork ass hands

this is my favourite story ever 1000 stars

Omg someone said exactly that to my white dad when he saw him with me and my brown siblings... but I think he meant something different by it....

I would bet my bong that he isn’t, but who knows...

Ewwww who takes their shoes off in a public washroom?

According to urbandictionary a stick is one gram of weed in Australia.

What, like it’s hard?

He’s still like a centimetre taller than me so i’ll make it work.

5’10”?! Seriously? That’s incredibly disappointing.

Yaaaaaasssss. I didn’t even know he was in the new movie until right now and now I want to see it sooooooo bad.

ugh do it already or stfu

I completely forgot that Harrison Ford and Callista Flockhart were married and that Callista Flockhart ever existed.

This is obviously a terrible story and nothing is funny about what she did, but her mugshot is hilarious and i’m pretty sure what my face looks like about 90% of the time.

I especially don’t understand Memphis because like we live in Canada so I don’t even know what that’s all about. Also I highly doubt Jaxzon (I checked with my dad; it’s spelled with an x and a z because ???) will ever have his name printed on a white coat anyway...

My cousin has a kid called Memphis... I don’t think she’s ever actually been there though. Her other kid is called Jackson but it’s spelled like Jaxon or Jakzon or something. It’s pretty unfortunate.

“Whim” is a gross sounding word.

Ashlaheigh? Is that a typo or just the most upsetting possible spelling of Ashley?