Yeah. She did not like the ex-wife, or fruit.

My husband and I worked really hard to pick an appropriate gift for our very close, very stylish friends. They lived in a huge, meticulously decorated home and had very particular tastes. We settled on a lovely, not inexpensive artisan fruit bowl. We were both so pleased at how much they liked it. I legit saw it in…

When I was 15, I was admitted to the psych ward through the ER for some pretty serious self-harm (cutting, specifically). It was November. I didn’t want to talk to my dad in there ‘cause I knew he’d be an asshole. He was such an asshole to the caretakers, though, that they MADE me talk to him just to get him off their…

Right, that’s it. You Yanks have gone too far this time.

So... their plan was just to rip off the Bridget Jones series?

Right after I gave birth to my son, my mom took a picture that included my naked, right titty, and texted it to our entire family. Does that count?

I had a family bridal shower thrown for me by my MIL.

Peri Gilpin, Jane Leeves, David Hyde Pierce and the late John Mahoney have been like family for years (Gilpin and Leeves are godmothers to each other’s kids, Pierce and Mahoney are/were godfathers to one of Leeves’ kids, Leeves and Gilpin and their respective husbands are next door neighbors, etc.) Notably missing…

And all pale in comparison to British sweets.

I actually love it best when Graham is obviously bored by them being lame and sort of slyly making fun of their lameness. It’s usually the ones who take themselves too seriously, which makes it all the better. 

“Amethyst Realm”

Once upon a time, this is what would’ve happened: he finds the wallet and turns it in to the box office; she calls the venue the next day and says, “did anyone turn in a lost wallet?” The venue says, “Yes, we have it.” She goes back to collect it.

My parents always thought it was so cute that I’d tuck all my dolls to sleep at night. They’d find their shoes turned into makeshift beds filled with Barbies. Tissue boxes were emptied in pursuit of tiny blankets. I was just such a loving kid with caretaker instincts. What they did not know was that my older sister…

I thought the dog waiting at the door for Jack was the most emotionally stirring part of the movie. :( Poor pupper. 

Nope. They are still together, and looking even more alike than ever now that Joe is sporting a beard.  

Superior:

Yaaas I wait for this all year. Ok, ok. Here’s my contribution this year.

My ex used to work at a bar that was reportedly haunted by the ghost of a woman who was killed by her husband on the property. All the women staff had experiences where they felt a friendly presence, they’d often think it was another female staff member who had come up behind them, they’d start talking and hear…

I’ve posted this before, under an old burner, but figured I can post again to lighten things up.