"As a palate cleanser for the last two weeks, please enjoy some stories of terrible customers receiving their just rewards."

I watched it with some Statham fans, both male and female, and by 45 min in the most exciting thing was seeing which one of us could bitch about it the loudest.

This is weird. Gary Lawless cares about rules and you actually have to pay for the Winnipeg Free Press. It's like words don't matter anymore.

It would keep dumbasses like Burgess honest and display their ignorance. They get voted into office in TX, particularly, due to aggressive gerrymandering and voter ID laws that are absurdly difficult to meet and alienate much of the voting population (poor, PoC, homeless, students away at college, etc.). The few…

My favorite part was watching the guy that threw the ball run or prance or fire dance or whatever the fuck you call that run away.

"[My children] think it was a four-legged man shaking his willy about. How I would have explained it God only knows."

Minor correction - they're not self-portraits. Unless Bobby has taken up painting in between being a shitty person.

"That'll show him."

Andrew:

Angering Drew enough to get him to write this, even though it physically pained him? I regret nothing.

Honestly, I don't think even Christie knows what he was trying to say. I'm not even sure he knows who he was pandering to.

My goodness. I don't think this is what the woman had in mind when she asked for a seat with a good view of the rim.

i have been owned on line again.

Let you down.

Add a month or two to that number, because she won't be able to have sex for 4-6 weeks by doctor's orders after the birth. Then you'll have the whole neither of you guys aren't getting any sleep so it's back to being a crap shoot. I think some good sex periods came after that, but after kid two it's all just distant…

Or remember taking a book with them, like I do to this freaking day. Who are these internet-dwelling tadpoles? Do they imagine that before the 2000s people just wandered around in a haze of boredom and social anxiety, making smalltalk with the strangers whose gazes they could not possibly avoid, hoping against hope…

Wow. You might want to go see a therapist.

For the record, you should never do stuff like this for someone you aren't currently dating. So: not for crushes, not for exes you're trying to win back, and not for people you've just started dating either.

Otherwise it just sorta screams "I'm creepily obsessed with you and have no sense of personal boundaries."

Alternate Take:

Guys are really bad at not weirding out women.

So wot's uh the deal with the sawed-in-half tennis ball thing? Expected an explanation by the end of that one, but it was still just "...sent her a sawed in half tennis ball."