I’m 52 and I still lie to my Mom. She can’t handle the truth.

Counterpoint: I have a friend with the last name DuBois who pronounces it Doo-boyz. Thatz not okay.

Spinning gold out of straw, as usual.

She’s a comic. Her job is to make people laugh. Why does she have to take a stand about anything? Also, if my friend said or did something shitty, I would discuss the issue with my friend. I wouldn’t trash my friend in social media. It’s not her responsibility to even comment on this.

The super high beds really seem to be a thing.

All I focused on was the lipstick. Full face of makeup and major lipstick in EVERY photo.

Daddy issues, I guess.

Okay, but I already have a healthy BMI and I’m physically active on a regular basis. So I need new workout goals to keep me motivated. Getting stronger and faster are my goals, and I don’t see anything unrealistic about that. And I’m trying to date over here, so I do want to look better. People in my situation need…

Mac and cheese pancakes!

Ryan Murphy is the bane of my existence. He has these truly great ideas that get me excited to watch his latest series, and then his poor execution of said ideas causes me to spiral downward into disappointment and despair. I predict there will be two good episodes and then each episode after that will suck more than…

There’s a lot of bad posture going on in that photo.

Hello friend! I too hate people who smoke cigars in parks. And all people who smoke cigars anytime, anywhere.

“Almost definitely going” means “definitely not going.” Same with “I’ll try to be there,” “if I get out of work in time,” etc.

That’s an awful lot of tennis.

Hermit life!

Right? And he was probably away shooting movies most of that time.

I have never taken a selfie. That’s not because I’m so virtuous, but because I feel ugly and I don’t want anyone to look at me. I think that people who take selfies have better self-esteem, and that’s a good thing.

He may be an asshole, but nothing he said in that clip is untrue.

What kind of car is considered typical of hispanics?

And yet, I know several vegan children who are perfectly healthy.