You Don’t Belong Up There, Austin Rivers

YES!

What some of the players must have been thinking at the end of the game

First he praised Missouri’s football teams, but I did not speak, for I had no idea they still had football teams in Missouri.

It’s so romantic when a couple saves themselves for their second marriage.

Reached for comment, John Elway said Sanchez’s name came to mind when someone mentioned Plan B.

This actually shows MLS is doing well. Because if they were in dire straits, they would have traded money for nothing.

Who fucking cares? Sam Ponder married an alleged Vikings employee/stats coordinator and nobody gave a shit.

“If he does not have a bloody sock, she did not receive the cock.”

Is this supposed to be a takedown or an endorsement as a basketball coach?

Conspiracy theorists still claim that the real dog is a sandwich.

You can’t use your hands, you idiot.

It’s like Alien vs. Predator but Legionnaire’s vs. Gonnorhea.

Always some sort of drama happening with those Gilmour girls

bitches.

‘e’s got busted with the PEDs once more
‘e’s been busted several times before
an’ everyone was by Jenrry (Jenrry!)
ne’er was his willie just a sham (no sham!)
It’s the Third failed test for Jenrry,
Jenrry the Third I am!

Second verse, same as the first.

In Peyton’s defense, Papa John probably tastes better than his pizza.

Look I know everyone wants to make this about “corporate greed” but I think Jed York is a pretty classy guy for not imposing a bunch of houseguests on Jim Tomsula.

Browns Mgmt: Johnny we’re going to have to cut ties with you.