The women in Houston titty bars all look like JJ Watt.

AJ: “Come on that was a strike!” ...Cricket(s)

I’d like to hear a few “Goddamn”s and “Fuck”s from Keith. I think HBO is a good fit.

+1 for spitting caliente fiyah.

Dempsey should’ve gotten in. Thank you, Landon, for always making me feel like my hairline doesn’t define my performance in or out of the bedroom.

Sacks Stars? Jesus, they’ve already nicknamed themselves. What’s next? A reality porno show where they make Greek salads and then Thai whores suck their buttholes?

Beautiful. Glorious. Erotic. Hard.

The guy at 1:07 was like, “huh... sheiiittttt, watch this son.” And the he tongue’d down your moms in public.

Moment of silence for the pressure this belt is under. It gave it hell, but after this, that hole will never be the same again.

What (the fuck) ever.

It's amazing he was as successful as he was, with only one arm. Anyways, as you was...

You sly dog.

I really think he went over the top on the Packers helmet. First rule of design: KISS: Keep It Simple Stupid.

I'm GONE!

"Every time the crowd chants 'Noodle! Noodle! Noodle! Noodle!' he gets hungry and eats another football." - River Monsters Ball Boy

They don't last, I know that. It'll be gone within the year.

After the game, Puddles was seen on the streets of Dallas, telling everyone his name was Jerry Jones and trading BJs for quack rocks.

I'd be mad if I was at hockey too.

Not that it matters, or that I even give a shit.